Friday, August 7, 2009

Clinton's next mission

Monologue | Aired Wednesday night on “The Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson” on CBS:

Bill Clinton is back in America after going to North Korea and freeing two journalists. To be fair, it wasn’t difficult for Bill. He’s used to sneaking women out of government buildings.


They landed in L.A. this morning. And it is quite a contrast between North Korea and L.A. One’s a cruel place, filled with soulless people who are despised by most Americans. And of course, the other one is North Korea.

Now that he’s freed the journalists, Bill Clinton’s next mission is get Paula Abdul back on “American Idol.”

The White House made it clear that, although Bill Clinton met with a world leader, he in no way speaks for the President of the United States. It’s the same disclaimer they use when Joe Biden travels.

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