Top Ten New England Patriots Excuses

David Letterman:

10. What? It's best-of-seven

9. Too much pre-game chowder

8. Since when is that dude allowed to catch a ball with his head?!

7. Terrified by that Fox football robot

6. Everything was fine til' Dr. Phil decided to straighten us out

5. Should have campaigned harder in Florida

4. Entire team stayed up late that night before watching Hannah Montana concert movie

3. Exhausted after spending hours consoling a weepy Terrell Owens

2. Thought game was supposed to be played on Super Tuesday

(...drum role please .....)

The number one New England Patriots excuse....

1. The airline lost our 'roids!

Patriots Watch

New England Patriots Schedule Watch $99.95
* Pre-programmed with your favorite team's season * ''Star Spangled Banner'' plays at the start of each game* Scroll function allows you to see upcoming games, locations and start times ...

Jay Leno's "everything must go" garage sale

Randy Moss New England Patriots Navy Premier NFL Jersey $99.99
The nylon/polyester New England Patriots Premier jersey from Reebok delivers superb value by combining quality and details that approach those of an authentic jersey with affordability rivaling ...

Football news: the stealers

Jay Leno:

Football news. What’s new with the Steelers? Not the Pittsburgh Steelers, the signal stealing New England Patriots.

The NFL is investigating whether or not the New England Patriots cheated during last Sunday’s game by videotaping the opposing coaches and stealing their hand signals. This could turn out to be the worst scandal involving hand signals since Senator Larry Craig got caught in that men’s room.

New England Patriots were penalized

Conan O'Brian:

Earlier today, the New England Patriots were penalized by the NFL because they were caught cheating during last week’s game. Coach Belichick had to give up a first round draft pick and quarterback Tom Brady had to give up one of his supermodels.

19-0: The Historic Championship Season of New England's Unbeatable Patriots

here the link to buy
"19-0: The Historic Championship Season of New England's Unbeatable Patriots" (Paperback) on Amazon.com

You might get it cheaper tomorrow...

(later in the day) oops! I just tried the link and realized that it has been abruptly removed from the Amazon web site ... I swear it was working earlier today...thats how I got the photo of the book! oh well....

Maine Temperature Conversion Chart

20 above: Floridians wear coats, gloves and woolly hats.....People in Maine throw on a sweatshirt.

zero degrees: People in Miami cease to exist....Mainers lick the flagpole.

-40 below: Hollywood disintegrates.....The girl scouts in Maine begin selling cookies door to door.

-60 below: Polar bears begin to evacuate AntarcticaMaine's Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it gets cold enough.

-100 below: Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.....Maine-iacs get frustrated when they can't thaw the keg.

-500 below: Hell freezes over......
The New England Patriots win the Super Bowl!